Things have been deep here. Very Deep. I haven't been posting lately, because I've been busy being deep. I'm investigating my house, I'm investigating my kids, I'm investigating my marriage. Things are going to change, and change for the better.
I struggle with so many things being easy. But, life is NOT easy. I need to learn that the way things "are" can only be changed by me. I alone, can only make the choices to change the things in my life that I am not happy with.
Do you find it is hard to look at yourself and see YOU for the real you? Do you ignore those things that you just don't want to see? I'm not suggesting that I do this in every aspect of 'hard" things that I have going on. But, here is an example.... Working out, watching my wieght, those kinds of things. It is easier to just gloss over and ignore and live the status quo. But, this I've got to change, move away from, and get back ME!
I have a husband who is pretty long-suffering. He is happy with most things, and needs very little, but some good lovin' and some good food. (Oh yeah, and a clean house) Most of the time he gets all of this and more. I have kids who need me to sit and read with them, cuddle and love them, feed and clothe them. But, I am a wife. A wife who needs to be told,"I love you," "You're beautiful", "Thank you" And, I am a mom. A mom who needs to be held and loved and kissed. I live in a fantasy world. God is in here somewhere, watching, waiting, patiently looking for the time I'll just turn to Him and STOP the insanity of trying to get there by myself. Wherever THERE is.
Deep is what this is all about.